grakogirl
Posts:19
 | | 10/16/2007 11:54 AM |
 Alert | | My Step daughther is in 2nd grade and 7 years old and has a major problem with lying, and the latest she forged my signature on a paper for the school. I have taken away everything from her her toys and her TV everythign you can think of and it hasn't helped at all so we gave back some stuff. Then she forged my signature and now I am at a loss and don't know what to do.....Please help any suggestions would help | | | |
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Bionicbunny
Posts:586
| | 10/16/2007 12:04 PM |
Alert | Sounds like she may be doing it to act out. Why don't you have one of her parents spend quality fun time with her and talk to her. Maybe she is angry with you. (It was your signature she forged not someone elses) I would do it before her lying turns in to a habbit.
Good luck | | | |
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grakogirl
Posts:19
| | 10/16/2007 12:12 PM |
Alert | | Ok see that is what we thought so for Fall Break we did fun stuff and I also bought her a necklace that she has wanted. So I am not sure what is going on. All she has is me and her dad and we are at a loss. The lying has been going on for about 2 months. | | | |
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Bionicbunny
Posts:586
| | 10/16/2007 12:23 PM |
Alert | Maybe something happened that seems perfectly normal to you, but not to her.
I don't want to get too personal on the forum but think like a 7 year old, maybe you had an argument with her dad that she overheard, maybe she was at school and kids were talking about their moms (you are her step) and she felt left out, maybe she feels left out at home as a family (in your avitar you have 2 other kids, is one of them her?), it could be so many different things. Has her dad tried talking with her? Not about the lying and forging, but about just life in general? | | | |
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grakogirl
Posts:19
| | 10/16/2007 12:31 PM |
Alert | Bionicbunny,
You are helping so thank you. In my picture those are my nephews, so no one of them is not her. Her dad has sat with her and talked and she sems fine then I sit with her and again she seems fine. I am trying to rack my brain with this and since I am new as a parent I am having a hard time with this. My mother passed away 5 years ago so I don't have her to ask so I asked my step mother and she had some good ideas that we will try tonight but she also suggested to ask other on here. So i do want to say thank you. As far as arguing we try not to argue in front of her. So we are not sure, you see at first she was just lying to me so I did think it was me. Then about 3 weeks ago she lied to her dad too so we don't know why.......The other bad thing is she is doing horrible in school. So I don't know if a counselor needs to get involved. Also I had to find out that she forged by looking at the paper and seeing it erased. The teacher didn't call us about it. So I am just frustrated and need other ideas, so if you have any more please help. | | | |
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Bionicbunny
Posts:586
| | 10/16/2007 12:38 PM |
Alert | | I have a friend who had 2 girls and got divorced. Her elementary aged daughter was put in to a program (I don't remember the name of it) after school 1ce a week and it was for kids whos parents for whatever reason were not married to each other anymore. It worked out great, she was able to talk in a group with other kids who were in the same situation she was in. About fears and frustrations, etc. Sometimes when a parent remarries, it is extremely difficult for the little ones. They don't want the new person to try to refill that place in the family. Maybe try to find a support group? | | | |
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grakogirl
Posts:19
| | 10/16/2007 12:53 PM |
Alert | | That is a good idea. I will look into that. Her dad and I have been together about 3 years now. She hasn't had her mom since she was 2 so there was 2 years there where all she had was her dad. I guess that might be the problem, so I will look into that thank you | | | |
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love@hm
Posts:484
| | 10/16/2007 1:41 PM |
Alert | Just wante to add, be patient, stuff like this takes time. Also, don't back down on the rules - you still have to be part of her discipline - don't buy too much for her either - because she may feel that is a power over you. No deals. No backing down, but stay nice, pleansant and LOVING!!!!! Also, I would call the school and see if a counselor is available to talk. I would be highly concerned (like you are) if my 2nd grader started forging my name -- dang - that's advanced thinking, LOL!
GL | | | |
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agit8d
Posts:209
| | 10/16/2007 1:42 PM |
Alert | What was the note for? Maybe she was afraid she would get into trouble if you saw what the note was about. Maybe she was embarrassed of what the note said.
I think (IMHO) that if you explain to her that she would be in more trouble for signing your name than for what ever the note was about she may understand better. Taking "things" away doesn't not address the actual problem...One of my kids did the same same and it was because they were embarrassed about getting in a little trouble in school...
I don't think you have to worry about being a life long problem just one that needs to be addresses and talked about. | |
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grakogirl
Posts:19
| | 10/16/2007 1:56 PM |
Alert | | All the note was for her to get candy at school. Her father and I had already to her no because she is in trouble with school so she took it upon her self to forge that. She is advanced in thinking about that I think the first and last time I ever tried that was when I was 16 or 17. We also went over that she was in more trouble for doing that. What I am confused about as well is why didn't the school call me and tell me it took awhile for us to find out because it happened right before Fall Break then we found out lastnight. I also have called the school we have parent teacher conference and a meeting with the counselor tomorrow so hopefully this will help as well. | | | |
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phxgirl
Posts:227
| | 10/16/2007 3:55 PM |
Alert | Grakogirl. She could just be having a hard time at school or just going through some "changes" I have a 10 yr old and it seems like the older they get the more they try to test their limits. The fact that you said No to candy and she wanted candy is prob why she did it ! It may not be as deep of a problem as suspected/suggested either. But it is a good idea to teach her it is unacceptable to do what she did ! Good luck ! My 10 yr old never ceases to amaze me/us ! We just have to have ALOT of patience, hold our tempers and be understanding. The nicer you are about the situation the more it sets in GOOD LUCK ! Try to justify the wrong doing and be fair with the punishment as well if you punish too hard they just resent YOU !! | | | |
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hendersona
Posts:395
| | 10/16/2007 4:26 PM |
Alert | | We have had the same problem with our 7yr old. And I've found that every time he is doing it he has to go tell the truth to all that were involved (teachers, friends ect..). He has learned that this is no fun and that's it's eaiser to tell the truth (even with something bad) then to go back and tell someone that you lied to them. I hope this helps | | | |
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HUH??
Posts:29
| | 10/16/2007 4:48 PM |
Alert | | WOW!! She beat my step daughter a year. My step daughter forged my signature (tried) in 1st grade. It was for something stupid too, nothing big like being in trouble or anything. I just tried to explain how it's not a big deal and she needs to let me know about things. We still have problems with her and her behavior. Does yours have problems with attitude and stuff? If you ever have any questions or anything feel free to pm me. | | | |
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HUH??
Posts:29
| | 10/16/2007 4:48 PM |
Alert | | WOW!! She beat my step daughter a year. My step daughter forged my signature (tried) in 1st grade. It was for something stupid too, nothing big like being in trouble or anything. I just tried to explain how it's not a big deal and she needs to let me know about things. We still have problems with her and her behavior. Does yours have problems with attitude and stuff? If you ever have any questions or anything feel free to pm me. I've been all she has for 6 years and think I might know a little about what you are going through | | | |
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